Session 4 – The Burning Questions
Posted by: Ronda Devereaux | June 18, 2014 | 8:06 pm
In session 4 of the Firestarter Sessions by Danielle Laporte, she asks us some pretty damn good questions. Often just asking a question put changes in motion. Even if you don’t have the answer, a good question stirs up reality (which is why coaching can be so life changing). Questions = contemplation/reflection = clarity. Questions can make us squirm. OK, maybe the questions don’t make us squirm, but our answers to those questions. Or the answers that we don’t want to admit are the answers to those questions.
This blog (and chapter) are a little different because instead of some up front talk and then questions at the end, Danielle did question/talk, question/talk all the way through the chapter. So I am going to mix it up and answer some of the questions below (not my full journal answer or this blog would get WAY too long) and just put it out there. Are you ready for a good squirming reality check? Let’s go –
THE BURNING QUESTIONS W O R K S H E E T
1. When someone at a party asks you what you do, what do you say? And how do you feel when you say it?
So I have to tell you this first question really made me pause. Why? Because, for me there is more than one answer to this question. Or maybe, it depends upon what group I am in how I answer this question. Am I an engineer today, or am I a coach? Am I an intuitive or a life strategist? The real answer is all of the above, but I have yet to find a cohesive statement that encompasses everything. And I definitely don’t lead with the coaching context when I am working at my engineering job, although I do mention the engineering job when I talk about being an intuitive and a life strategist. It rounds everything out. And sometimes, when I am thinking on my feet I say “I am an engineer by trade, and a life coach by design” (I need to add closet intuitive to that last statement).
– and nowhere in any of these statements did I say that I am a writer which is what I am doing right now. Seems like this question could lead me in circles for awhile. Point – I need some more reflection/clarity right here, right now. OK, on to question 2 (and no I am not skipping ahead, I am just sparing you all the retroreflection going on in my little head at the moment).
2. What do people thank you for most often? What do they come to you for, or say about you, most frequently (positive or negative)?
This one was much more easy for me – insight and clarity. They might not use those words, but if I was going to sum it all up, that is what I would say (now I have to ask my friends/clients what they would say).
3. When do you feel powerful, passionate, free, incredibly useful, excited, inspired?
When I am teaching. When I am having one of those really deep conversations that gets to someones heart and allows them to see into themselves in a way that they have never seen themselves before.
4. What do you think your form of genius is? What are you amazing at (work or life-related)?
Connection. Digging deep. Recognizing patterns – in peoples lives, in businesses, in groups.
5. Who do you think is really cool or elegant or powerful?
Danielle Laporte (obviously), Brene’ Brown, Marie Manuchehri, spiritual books (all of them), learning (constantly), seeking, striving – all in my sparkly red shoes.
6. What’s chronic, repetitive, or inflamed in your inner or outer life?
What day is it? Has life always gone this fast? Do I want it to go this fast? This may not be the particular “thorn” Danielle was targeting with this question, but that is what popped up first so something is in there.
7. What’s always in the back of your mind?
Did I get that blog published? Did I forget to pick one of my kids up? Did my phone calendar get deleted? When was the last time I went to the gym? Why won’t all those useless emails just disappear (now I am rambling)? I think this points back to question 6. I think Danielle was going for those small whispers in the back of our minds that sometimes we listen to and other times we don’t. For me, when life gets crazy busy like it is right now, I can’t always hear those whispers.
8. What would you like to stop doing?
Social media – I prefer the in person thing. I also like the writing thing. Totally different vibe.
9. How much money would you like to be making?
More than I am right now (or maybe I should state – more than my 3 teenagers are spending right now). Danielle’s intent with this is about giving yourself a goal, and reaching – not about gluttony or exhaustion. It’s about sending a message to your subconscious (which takes things very literally).
10. How would you like to be seen, recognized, acknowledged, rewarded, praised?
I love it when I know that I have made a difference in someone’s life.
11. So . . . what would you like to do with your life and career? (Money is no object. Dream.)
Have deep life altering conversations with people every day of my life.
OK – back to question #1 – I am a CONNECTOR. I have said this often and it encompasses everything – the engineer, the coach, the intuitive, the life strategist and the writer. I connect people to themselves – other people – things – patterns – souls – ideas – it all fits. Now if I can just make a cohesive sentence out of that statement…. Maybe by Lesson 5 – see you there!